Dear Snide Atheist,
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
H.W.
Dear H.W.,
Your ignorance makes me want to run to the kitchen and castrate myself with a melon-baller! The answer is simple: enough to drive away the annoying bible-nuts who interrupted his relaxing Saturday by banging on his door to preach at him about their ridiculous, delusional fairy tales. What kind of idiot tries to convert a woodchuck in the first place? It's utter nonsense.
Sincerely,
The Snide Atheist
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