Dear Snide Atheist,
If there is no God, who kills the kittens when I masturbate?
Spherical Basterd
Dear Spherical Basterd,
You'll be happy to know you and my left testicle share the same name! Where did you hear such a ridiculous idea? Don't worry about it. Nobody kills kittens when you masturbate. They simply commit suicide due to an inability to deal with the disgusting idea of you defiling yourself. Personally, I don't blame them.
Sincerely,
The Snide Atheist
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